The Braun family culture czar would like to ask cyberspace for support with a little family problem... You see, Tamara has never seen a Star Wars movie! Not the original three classics (R2D2, anyone?). Not the latest three episodes that introduced us to household names like Jar-Jar Binks and Darth Maul. Not even the Ewoks movies with the horribly fake vulture-like creature in the mountain cave and the sticky-fingered, zippy little pet rabbit thing. Nothing.
Please, everyone collectively gasp.
And now (please) everyone chime in and tell Tamara how un-American this is and how she should definitely succumb to a weekend of Star Wars movies with her husband. Go ahead, tell her how much she would love that! And tell her how uproaringly hilarious the above cartoon is!
For the sake of culture in the Braun home, please support this cause!
31 comments:
**CORRECTION** Courtney and I (and our parents) saw one of the new Star Wars in the theater. We can do the most amazing reinactment of the fight scene you have ever seen. Granted, we have no idea who the characters were or just what the devil was going on in the plot, but we are Oscar worthy in our performance of the scene. Coach, back me up...
Sometimes Tammy is a crack head and rambles on about stuff I'm pretty sure never happened but not this time, she's telling the truth. I would try to describe the whole thing here on the blog but it just wouldn't do our live performance justice. Braun, if you're trying to imagine just how good of a performace it is, picture in your mind my cyclopse (aka T-Rex) immitation and its just about that good.
Okay, I stand corrected. If Tamara and Courtney agree to a public re-enactment of the Star Wars fight scene, I think the culture czar would be appeased. Otherwise, my plea to cyberspace stands!
I'm feeling a movie night coming on!!! We can do the original triology or all 6 episodes in one shot! We'll have to get "the relief society" to bring in meals because it will be such a freaking unhealthily good time.
This is something that needs to go on your bucket list.
SCENE: Adam hunched forward Mr. Burns-esque rolling finger tips together, slobber everywhere:
"Excellent idea, Smithers."
Tamara!! You have GOT to see the Star Wars Movies!! They are FANTASTIC!! And I would frankly like to invite myself to the "shut in" when you watch them!! We can bring Doug's working lightsaber, his commemorative book he got for Christmas, figurines and his childhood Darth Vader Phone. We also have posters that we could donate as well.......
We even went to "Star Wars Weekend" at Disney a few years back! Okay, I think I have brought the point home that we are nerds. I am leaving now.....
Okay sorry one more thing! Check out my blog where just today I posted pictures of my nephews dressed up as what else??? Yoda and a Storm Trooper.
In the full intrest of the Braun Family, I think both a live re-enactment of the Lightsaber Duel and a dedicated Star Wars Marathon is in order. Grantid we are looking at approximately 15 hours worth of movie enjoyment. That alone would be worth a thousand stories for future generations of the Braun Family, and you would start a legacy that must be passed down. I really don't see how anyone could turn down such an event. Not knowing or understanding the Star Wars Phenomenon is like saying you don't know who George Washington is, or why the 4th of July is important. Star Wars is as much a part of American culture & history as Valley Forge or Abraham Lincoln. Any self respecting American must watch the entire series at least once all the way through.
Yes, you have to see the movies. They are great. I mean haven't you ever gone up to a fan and said, "Luke, I am your father."? I guess it doesn't have the same meaning if you haven't seen the movies. Seriously what did you watch as a child? For us it was Star Wars and Goonies. Next, your gonna say you grew up in Cali never listening to the Beach Boys.
When I was a teenager, my friend found out that I had never seen Star Wars either. SO, we went on a church campout and spent the entire night watching all three episodes in her van. They weren't that bad, considering my other option of sleeping outside in the freezing cold. Of course, I have never seen them again. THEN I saw the first two new ones because they came out during my "dating years" - good thing the guy always paid. Finally, I stood up for myself when the third new one came out and said NO. No to doing something because everyone else is doing it and NO to watching a bunch of non-human things fight and talk in stupid non-human language and NO to thinking that Harrison Ford (who is older than my father) is attractive. I've felt better ever since. Now, that said, I'd probably appease the husband by watching them all once because you probably won't HATE them. BUT, you might need to bring something to do while you watch....
Adam, can we still be friends?
Tamara! I am ashamed to call you sister. I recently rented Battle for Endor (the wierd first film) with when I watched my cousin's three sons and outdated as the special effects are, Tic the "zippy little rabbit pet" is still one of my favorite characters and I secretly want to be named Cyndal. What's up with the american culture rebellion? P.S. The original three movies are better I think than the newer three, and I think you at least have to watch them. Since you are having a baby and it's a 50/50 shot at getting a boy, who WILL love star wars, why don't you give yourself a head start and learn to love it now!
Strong showing, Katie. Thanks!
Lisa, No. :)
grabs - i DID love the original trilogy when i was younger, but the new ones get dumber and dumber.
plus if you have a boy it is better to plead ignorance... otherwise you will have hour long conversations about who kills who and who is bad, who is good, who has two lighsabers... you get the picture. it is much easier to say "i don't know, go ask your dad".
I'm inclined to agree with Cat... Of course, I feel that "Go ask your Dad" is a good answer to any question!
I think you should for sure lock yourself in and see the first 3. But then pretend like that's all there is, because the last 3 definitely don't measuer up. Okay, so maybe that's not fair to say cause I never saw the 3rd new one - I stopped after the 2nd because I felt the special effcts were over the top and the story line was almost non-existant.
Whatever you do don't let anyone rope you into watching spaceballs...
I support you Tamara! I haven't seen any of them either and have no plans to!
Steph -
Our friendship is touch and go after learning this about you.....
I'm going to need some time to think frankly.
That cartoon is HILARIOUS!!!! What is not hilarious is the fact that Tamara hasn't seen Star Wars. How is that even possible? What about fireworks? Or a baseball game? Or an apple pie? Have you seen those before? Please tell me you have or I'll be forced to report you to immigration.
I have never seen the original 3 Star Wars movies and I actually tried to see the first of the latest 3, but fell asleep everytime I went to the theater! I don't think you're unAmerican at all and commend you for taking a stand!
So, basically, Tamara was never a nerd. I could have told you that. :) Tamara, I've gotten tricked into seeing some of this crap in the same way you're about to be (so that I wouldn't be the only person in the Church who didn't get all of the EFY talks about parallels) and I actually liked a few things about it, but even in the 90s it seemed stupid b/c the acting and special effects were so outdated. It's the kind of thing you have to have watched a lot as a kid to appreciate now--like Val Kilmer's "Real Genius," which is either the best movie in the world or the worst, depending on when you first saw it and how much you've seen it since. Star Wars is for nerds. Why else was it chosen as the only way that Sarah Jessica Parker could communicate with the classic nerd in "Failure to Launch?" Trust me, you're not missing much. But if you do give in, let me know so that I can do my impression of Yoda on his first date. Like it you will, hmmmmm?
Wow! I feel like I know you pretty well considering I've been your sister-in-law for basically a decade now, right? I didn't know this however!!! I'm SHOCKED! Yeah, you HAVE to see the Star Wars movies... you just have too! I have never really been into the movies all that much, but I will admit that at one time in my little girl days I wanted to be Princess Leia. I even have pictures of me as a kid with the whole Princess Leia hairstyle goin' on! Not only that, my favorite stuffed animal as a kid was a stuffed Ewok that Jeremiah got me one year for Christmas! It's a MUST that you see Star Wars!
FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT'S GOOD AND HOLY!!! SEE THE ORIGINAL THREE!!
Ok, I agree - Steph, our friendship is in question. And Marcus, I resent being called a nerd. I've seen your bookshelf.
Oh, and BTW - "Real Genius" is genius. "This? This is ice. This is what happens to water when it gets too cold." Used that line on Thursday. Someone gave us that movie as a wedding present and they rock.
I have to tell you that I had gone my entire 28-and-a-half years of life without seeing the Star Wars "phenomenon" in its entirety, and I have to tell you...I really felt like I hadn't missed much. So, Tamara, please don't think that your life will be fulfilled by sitting though a bunch of overrated movies, because it won't, no matter what my dorkier-than-I-thought friend does to convince you otherwise. :-) Don't give into the dark side of the force!
Thanks to all of you who were supportive in my cause to imbue my wife with some much needed culture! Star Wars is an integral weaving of the tapestry that is American culture.
For all you negative, pessimistic naysayers out there who would not support this worthy effort:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N1h6onXX0dM
I rest my case.
:)
Yes, Adam, your video of R2DWhatever playing an iPod is certainly proof of Doug's comment that "Star Wars is as much a part of American culture & history as Valley Forge or Abraham Lincoln." I mean, sure, if it weren't for Valley Forge and Honest Abe, American culture would just be called "culture" because we wouldn't be American at all, we'd still be a British colony (with slaves, since Abe wouldn't have liberated them) paying unreasonable taxes on tea and everything else. But yeah, you guys are right, this little robot that can play music and do flips while he fights (that's right, I saw a few minutes of one. I know some nerds) is way more important to American history than American history is. :) By the way, I only got two takers on hearing my Yoda voice (Lois and Doug) and they both loved it, even if my wife "hates it she does, hmmmmm?!?!"
Still worried that a lawyer has the gall to call anyone else a nerd...
Touché, my friend. Touché.
http://video.msn.com/?mkt=en-us&vid=c044d322-a4f6-4a38-925a-12d01ef81fb8&playlist=videoByTag:tag:most%20watched%20viral:ns:MSNVideo_Top_Cat:mk:us:vs:0&from=MSNHP&tab=m1192124571607>1=28114
Star Wars on a level Tams would understand.
"This bickering is pointless." Not to worry, Adam. Your kids will watch it so many times that she'll have it memorized. She'll be quoting it left and right. "Patience, Luke."
http://video.msn.com/?mkt=en-us&vid=c044d322-a4f6-4a38-925a-12d01ef81fb8&playlist=videoByTag:tag:most%20watched%20viral:ns:MSNVideo_Top_Cat:mk:us:vs:0&from=MSNHP&tab=m1192124571607>1=28114
Star Wars on a level Tams would understand.
"This bickering is pointless." Not to worry, Adam. Your kids will watch it so many times that she'll have it memorized. She'll be quoting it left and right. "Patience, Luke."
Adam, I understand your pain. Gretchen's parents are apparently rather anti popular media, and so she is almost completely media illiterate! I've gotten her started on a steady dose of the Simpsons, and we are watching heaps of movies, but it still pains me every time I quote something and she doesn't even realise it is a quote!
More to the point of Star Wars, though - Tamara, of COURSE you need to see it! For one, everyone is all like "Oh, that is so nerdy!" but come on... are you going to claim you and Adam are not nerdy? For another, it is important to your eternal companion, and surely that is reason enough to do it!
Alex, you are the man!
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